037 - Finding Alignment and Identity: Paloma Siepak on Balancing Passion, Career, and Community

Welcome back to Stylist Soul Tribe Conversations! In this episode, Lisa is joined by a very special guest, Paloma Siepak, an independent stylist and booth renter in Southern California who specializes in balayage, extensions, and personalized guest experiences. Paloma is also a valued member of the Stylist Soul Tribe and a speaker on the nurture panel at the upcoming Resource Fair.

Episode Highlights:

• Career Path Transformation: Paloma shares her journey from aspiring musical theater performer to becoming a successful independent stylist. Initially set on a clear path towards Broadway, Paloma's trajectory shifted unexpectedly, leading her to the hair industry.
• Unexpected Opportunities: Discover how Paloma’s career pivot happened when her theater degree was interrupted and her godmother offered her a chance to become a stylist, a decision that set the stage for her future success.
• Struggles with Worthiness: Paloma opens up about her challenges with feeling worthy of her place in the hair industry, often feeling like she didn't belong because her passion was originally elsewhere.
• Balancing Multiple Interests: Learn about Paloma’s early career struggles as she juggled her love for theater and her work as a stylist, and how this internal conflict impacted her growth.
• Realizations and Growth: Hear about the significant growth Paloma experienced after accepting that she could focus on her career as a stylist without giving up her love for theater, leading to her investment in skill-building and business programs.
• Community and Support: Paloma talks about the support she found in the Stylist Soul Tribe, which helped her feel valued as a person and led to personal breakthroughs, particularly during a transformative retreat.
• Mindset Shift: Discover the mindset shift that allowed Paloma to see her work as a stylist as a means to fulfill her broader life goals, integrating her passion for theater into her business and finding true contentment.
• Living in Alignment: Paloma emphasizes the importance of living in alignment with one's values and intuition, sharing how this led to a more fulfilling career and personal life.
• Continued Passion for Theater: Despite her primary career in the hair industry, Paloma continues to pursue theater as a passion, participating in local productions and maintaining her love for performing.
• Encouragement for Others: Paloma's story is a testament to resilience, adaptability, and following one's intuition. She encourages listeners to trust in their journey, embrace their unique paths, and integrate their passions into t

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Transcript

1:09

Hello friends. Welcome back to stylus old tribe conversations. I am joined by a very special guest today Paloma CPAC She is a stylus old tribe member. She's an independent stylist and booth renter in Southern California who specializes in balayage extensions and personalized guest experience Paloma is actually going to be a speaker on the nurture panel at our upcoming resource fair because that is absolutely her superpower It has been such a joy getting to know her over the last couple of years inside of SST. And I am so grateful that she was willing to come on and share her story with you all today. Paloma, how are you doing friend? Hi, Lisa, I'm doing great. Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here. Thank you for being brave enough. I don't know what order I'm going to release these episodes. So spoiler alert, whichever one comes out first, we did a episode with all of Soul Tribe 20. So that had Jen, who's been on the podcast and all the rest of your. Soul Tribe 20 members. And we did that a month ago now. Cause that was the day I was waiting for my internet to get set up after I moved into my new house. So it was a month ago. And then Paloma was like, I think I want to come on and like share my own story personally. And I was like, girl, you should like do it. I've, I always need to be back to recording episodes. You totally should. And. So I'm going to preface, you'll hear with her story along the way, but I don't even know what I'll title this or how to put it into words, but Paloma has a really special and unique situation where, correct me if these words are not the right way to put it, but where you really thought that you were going to go a different direction with your life and your career. You really thought there was going to be a different trajectory, and it's been really inspiring to watch you, one by one, own that, recognize that, come to that conclusion, and then, like, figure out what direction you wanted to go from there, and, like, accept and love and lean into that moving forward. Is that a fair way to say that? Like, that's going to be kind of what we're discussing today? Yeah, that's a really good explanation of what has happened. I had a This very clear path of what my passion was, what I wanted to do with my life. And it was just kind of like this opportunity to become part of the hair industry kind of fell into my lap while I was discovering that path. And it's just been like a whole whirlwind of a story to get to this point because I struggled a lot with worthiness feeling that I deserved to be here and that there was a place for me in the industry because my heart was somewhere else. Yeah. Why don't we take it back quite a bit so that they know the, the story leading up to there. So you've heard the podcast a million times. Start back whatever feels appropriate and kind of start to share your journey, what direction you thought you were going to go, how the industry kind of fell into your lap, all that jazz. And as I do, I'm sure I'll interrupt you. We'll go on a few different tangents, but let's just go from there. Okay. So yeah, so I graduated in high school. I was in, I've always been a performer. My parents are both singers, dancers, musicians. I've always been around the entertainment industry and I wanted to do musical theater. Broadway was like my dream. I saw wicked for the first time. It was my favorite show. And I was like, I can do that. Like, I never knew that that was a real like career. I knew my parents did it like on the side. But I didn't know I could do that. And I just like fell in love with it. And I just went full force and applied for all the colleges that were arts schools. And I went to college to get my degree in musical theater. So I started that and the the university that I went to allowed me to go half of the way. And then you had to kind of audition into the program. And there were all these steps you had to, like, they were called juries. You had to do a scene with a partner, sing a couple songs, and then pass your tests in jazz, tap, and ballet to be considered. And then they took five girls and five boys into the program to finish with the BFA. And I, unfortunately, did not pass one of my assessments. And when you don't pass your assessment, they don't allow you to continue on in the program. So, like, you don't get to retest. What would you have to do if you, like, said, no, I'm not giving up on this? So, you can. I was still eligible to jury, but I couldn't take any of the classes because they place you. So they're like, I technically wasn't out, but you can only jury one time. And essentially they're weeding out. And like, unfortunately there was a lot of politics at the school that I went to. And I just kind of felt like if they're kicking me out now, it's not right. And so I thought like, well, I don't want to just settle and change my degree to something else. I really want this musical theater degree. So I'm going to leave. And I'm going to go somewhere else. I'm going to work on my skills and transfer to another college so that I can get my degree in musical theater, which is what I wanted. And so in that time it was mid semester and I couldn't really transfer anywhere. And so I'm like, well, I mean, what am I going to do for this, this time? And so my Nina, who's my godmother, she has been a salon owner for 30 years. She and I are very, very close. We were together. All the time when I was young and she's, we were talking at Christmas one time and she's like, so what are you going to do? Like, what is, what is your plan now since you've left? And I'm like, what? I don't know. I guess I'll just figure it out. And she's like, well, have you ever considered doing hair? I'm like, Oh no, not recently. Like that wasn't really on my radar. And she's like, well, I mean, I have a chair if you want. It's like a flexible career. I understand what you're doing and I would support you to continue. Going to school, doing your theater. But in the meantime, you would have something else that helps you to make money that has a flexible schedule that has a boss that supports your dreams. And I was like, okay, well I'm not doing anything else. And she's like, just go get your license and you have a place here. And so it just kind of fell into my lap and I thought, well, I have nothing else to do, so why not? It's creative. What age were you at that point? I was 19. I believe this was 2000. nine or yeah, 2008. And then I started hair school in 2009. Okay. So I was just kind of like, all right, let's go. Let's see, let's see how this works out. But the plan was always still to keep pushing for the theater. Yeah. So that's kind of like how I got started and it just took off. I mean, I wasn't, so when then you were, you, you started that you went to beauty school, you started working behind the chair. What was that transition from when I met you to You know, was theater, when did theater, was it still a 50 50 part? How did that slowly trickle? Did something happen where we were like, I'm setting that down. How did that transition go? So I continued going to I moved to a community college and I, Got, I was going to hair school in the evening and I was going to theater classes in the day, and that was a two year program. I got my license. I started working behind the chair, like the next day after I got my license. And it was very, at that time, since I've been doing hair for 13 years. And at that time it was like, you just have to come and sit here and wait and wait for walk ins. Yeah. Yeah. Take everything, learn. I was watching, I was helping. I was just, you know, assisting as best I could. And. Like still going to school. And then I wasn't really building. And she's like, well, you're not here. It's hard for you to take clients if you're not here. And like, they come in and I'm like, well, she won't be here till three or four o'clock this afternoon. Come back. So I thought, okay, I'm going to take a break from school. I'm just going to be here. I'm going to do this. And so I just did that. I, Put my job. I was hosting at a restaurant. I quit my job there and I just sat every day came and then I did a lot of community theater in the evenings just for fun. Yeah. And it's like, I still wasn't growing. And I'm like, why is this not happening? And I'm a very big believer in like the universe has plans. And so I was thinking like my big break is coming and this is why I don't have clients yet because I'm going to get something and I'm going to have to leave. And so, you know, at that time, cruise ships, all these things were things. And so. I just left it at that and like it started getting to a point where I was getting older and I still wasn't building and I'm like, what's going on? Like I've been doing the things I've been sitting here, I've been coming and she's like, well, you're not hungry and you're doing two things and you can't. And it's fair to say that deep down truthfully, you didn't want to grow like a massive clientele, right? I mean, it would have been nice to get you by for the meantime, but you knew you were waiting for the big break. You were waiting to wait, walk away from the entire clientele at any moment, right? Yeah. Yes, I was. And it came to, she's like, you're going to have to choose what you want to do, because it's hard to put your heart in both places and be successful. And like, I know that was like from the heart and it didn't mean what I took it to mean, but I took it to mean, if you choose one thing, you give up the other. And I couldn't do that. Like in my heart, I couldn't say. I'm not going to be a performer anymore. Like it just wasn't true. And I held onto that for a long time. And I think it hindered a lot of my growth and I just like, wasn't doing anything. So I'm like, you know what? I feel guilty. I didn't finish my degree. I'm going to go back to school. So I went back to school and I thought, I'm not going to do theater because I could have just done it then. So I'm gonna get my business degree. This is for my, you know, to grow my hair business. It's something I can learn and I'll get that piece of paper. Did that for about a year. He did it. He did everything to do with business. It wasn't anything about hair business. It was, you know, the typical stuff. So I'm just going to go back to theater so I can finish this degree. That's the closest I've got. And I went for about. I transferred back to the original university I went to took a winter class and started the next semester and about a week and a half in I was so stressed out with everything that I'm like, I can't do this. I don't, I can't do it. This isn't right either, yeah. I couldn't and I'm not a quitter and I felt like I was disappointing everybody by like, Deciding to leave. And I, like, I had to have a heart to heart with my mom and dad. And I'm like, I don't know what to do. Like, I don't want to let you down, but like, I can't do it. Like, I don't know. And they're like, we, we're not disappointed. We want to help you. We want you to be happy. We want to support you with whatever you want to do. And that's all we care about that. You're happy. We're here for you. If this, whatever direction it is, like. You don't have to feel guilty because your path changed. So you didn't get a BA, you got your license to do hair. Are you planning to leave that? And then I was like, well, at this point, no, like I'm going to stay doing this. Like, then why waste your time? Why waste your money? You're only young one school will be there. Spend your money and your time investing in your career and your skills, grow your business, do what you love. What year would you say that conversation took place? That was about seven years after I started. So 2018. Okay. And I was like, okay, they're not disappointed. I'm going to, I'm just going to do it. And so I immediately signed up for a skills class with Lisa Loves Balayage. I'm sure a lot of people know who she is because I decided that I really wanted to be a blind specialist. And it was something that, I always wanted for myself and to be able to give to others. And so I just started there and I took class after class after class. You started to get that hunger that, that your, you know, godmother said years ago, like that's what it took, but it turned out your parents like approval was almost what allowed you to have that hunger, which is really interesting. Yeah. And it just kind of started going from there. And so I did that and then I started dabbling with social media and working on, I took a class for that. And then I found Thrivers in 2019 of the fall and dove into that. And then it was shut down. I'm like Well, I guess like that was a sign because I had found her a little bit before maybe a year or two before and I didn't follow through. And then this time I thought I'm doing it. I'm committed this time. Like I'm just deciding that I'm going to be successful here, whatever it takes. I want to pause on that because I vividly remember that feeling too. And I think anyone that does see mega success or any bit of success, people who don't experience that don't realize How much intention has to go into it like you don't just that doesn't just happen on its own. I vividly remember thinking that as well. Like, okay, what I'm doing right now isn't working. I am gonna like I chose I know I'm going to figure this out. I'm going to do whatever it takes. I'm not going to stop. And I don't think everybody realizes that that is a conscious thought for everyone. Everybody who does anything of importance or that anyone finds impressive. So, yeah, I just wanted to highlight that, that I really relate to that as well. Yeah, and I just, I was like So what if it's not my passion? I'm going to be good at it and I'm going to do the best because when I decide I'm going to do something, I'm going to do it. Like, I know that I'm committed. And so that was kind of in the back of my mind, but I didn't care. I'm like, it's fine. I'll, I'll like it someday. It'll be fine. Like, we'll get there. And I just like dove in and I started having fun. And like, I was grateful that I had the program because I felt like it really helped me to build that foundation and to grow. Nurture my clients enough that they stayed and they, they supported me through, we were closed for 30 weeks here in Southern California. So crazy. Yeah. It was very crazy. And like, it just, again, a universal thing that like, I may have not had the time had I done it without the shutdown. I don't know. Yeah. But it was something for me to go and all these things that I never thought I would do like, Oh, I have a website. What? Like I never thought I'd have a website. I have an app for my clients. We have this booking thing. We're doing all this stuff, like things that were just foreign to me then because I didn't have an example of that. And I just went full force with that. And, and then I started joining some other business programs. I joined PVP with Hunter and then and I found you after that. And what drew me in with soul tribe was. Like the other programs were amazing. I credit a lot of success to them, but they grew so fast and so big that I started feeling left behind. And I crave community, especially doing theater. We do a show, we become so close with each other. We know everyone. And when I started to feel like, I don't know everyone, a lot of this content is speaking to. The masses, wherever you're at. I started feeling left behind. I started feeling like, man, I'm doing so much work and I'm not getting there. It's not happening. Doesn't that go to show, too? Just because I relate to this so much, like, I created Soul Tribe out of that, like, desire for connection that I had once that was starting to, like, like, I wanted to expand upon that. And isn't that wild that You thought that the passion was theater, and maybe in some ways it still was, but as soon as you felt part of a community, it's almost like, oh, I guess it doesn't really matter what we're doing, but I have my people. I have, like, someone to show up for. I have people to lean on. Like, to me, I say that all the time. I mean, I'm behind the chair a little bit now still, but not much, but it's still just that, like, deeper, this feels good getting up every day and, like, having People in your corner, you know, and like you said, you related that to the theater, you know, experience so much. And then once you found that, you were like, okay, I'm actually more content with that. So I vividly remember from my perspective hearing this, you know, not this deep of your story, but a part of your story during a vision casting workshop, because I'm so woo. And I'm like, put anything you could ever want on a vision board, like all the law of attraction, manifestation things say that. And I remember you sharing that Paloma and. Even still hearing you talk about this, I'm still like, it's not too late, it's never too late, like, your big break or whatever, like, I don't think anybody should ever let that go, but then also how do we live with this healthy, balanced, you know, how do we navigate that while also not feeling upset with the current moment, but being open to something happening in the future, and so, I remember, Kind of struggling with coaching you through that because I didn't want to just say like forget it But you also had come through so many realizations of like that's not what you're hardcore pursuing right now Like I I vividly do remember that and then I remember you doing a show and then obviously I brought this up before we hit record I remember your experience at the retreat. What was that just in may? Was that this last retreat? Yeah last year Yeah, so it was it was a year ago and I remember you opening up and I and when you said it at the retreat I'd obviously heard it before I guess I didn't realize How heavy that was still weighing on you and how much of, like, your story and your identity that was. And I remember, obviously, like, Kristen pouring into you and your tribe pouring into you and your group. And I'd love to, like, shift that. That was my perspective. I'd love to hear what progressed through Soul Tribe. And even where you're at today. And even if it's not perfectly tied up with a bow, that's okay, too. But how did you start to put that puzzle together and see You know, either your, your, your vision and your goals changing and or finding contentment in the meantime. I think the biggest thing. So the social tribe, especially is that like, I really wanted someone to care about me, like not me as a stylist, but me as a person is Paloma where I'm at right now. And like to be able to open up and how it was affecting my business and my tribe really did that for me. And we, they continued to do that. And you'll hear if the episode hasn't aired yet just the special bond that we have together. And then I mentioned it in that one too, that it was like such an identity crisis that I, I couldn't see past that. And I was struggling to fill my books and I couldn't figure out, cause you and I had been working for a year. We've had one on ones, we had hot seats, we had all the things. And I'm like, I don't know. We're doing everything. Why, why can't I get these clients? What is wrong? And it came down to at the retreat when we did the homework that it was a block that I like maybe it was subconsciously pushing away or telling the universe I didn't want that because I felt like such a fraud that I didn't belong here because this opportunity fell in my lap. And when I, you know, would think about so many other people that I heard talking about how I've always wanted to be a stylist, this is my passion. I dreamed of it. I did this when I was a kid, all of those things was none of my story. And I felt like, Well, why am I taking up a space when someone else here wants it so bad? And I would think that about actors that I would see not appreciating their opportunities and think I want what you have so bad and you don't appreciate it, like move over for me. And so I felt like I was doing that to somebody else in this industry. And like everyone there was like, no, you've worked hard. You've done all the things to, to earn a place here. And just because. This is what makes you money doesn't mean you're not that like, it doesn't mean you have to give up who you are. Just work around it. And so then I started thinking about it and thinking about it a lot like at that trip about what I valued and how those values are really what Pushed my decision to commit because I was getting older. I wanted to get married. I wanted to have a family someday. I want them to be close to my family, to my husband's family. Like, I don't want to be wondering where my next paycheck is going to be. And I knew my skill. Like, I know that I'm good, but I, I didn't know that like, I wanted to commit to like, really focusing on like pushing. You know, the audition situation and taking classes in the voice, it's expensive and it's a lot of work. And I'd have to take off work to do that. I just got married. We have financial responsibilities. We want. You know, those things came up and seeing the possibilities and people around you and the lifestyle that people are living and being like, Oh yeah, this industry does provide you that. And I, I'm going to go back to that realization. I just want to say it again and highlight it because I especially maybe not all hairstyles. Maybe if you actually look at all cosmetologists, this probably doesn't affect as many, but I think the cosmetologists that are listening to this, like we're a different breed. We almost like. Identify with our business so strongly that we lose sight of who we are outside of that. And I loved that realization. I love that holistic approach of like, you can still have this be your job and fulfill other passions. And you can be a multifaceted person without having to totally give up one or the other or like totally have this like identity thing. thing where it can only be one. And I, I'm, I'm so glad that you guys were able to come to that realization. I don't know who said it first or how that came across, but I think there's probably a lot of people listening to this, that need to hear that. I know myself included, like we definitely get wrapped up in that and entrepreneurship. Yes. And that's why I like, I felt called to tell the story because I felt like this is something that I needed when I was in that place and I would have wanted to hear that from someone else or just to open the doors that like, you know, Not everyone starts off because their passion is hair, like it just leads you there. And it was Kristen Sosman that spoke to me at lunchtime at the retreat. This is on the last day, you know, I remember sitting at the end of that table. Yeah. And she was like, why, like, why did you? Why are you feeling like this? And I was like, well, I don't know. I just feel like I don't belong here. I wanted to do this. And she's like, well, why didn't you do that? I'm like, and I just like, had this breakdown of like, I didn't think I was good enough. I didn't think I could. And she's like, so then why, you know, you're blaming being a hairstylist because you made a decision. Like, You're, you're like essentially holding resentment towards your career because you didn't do something that you really wanted to do, but why did you, it was. And it was like, why did you become a stylist? I'm like, well, I wanted flexibility. I wanted free time. I wanted to be there for every important event that happened. And she's like, well, do you do that? And I'm like, yeah. Yeah, I do. I do. I do do that. And I still do theater. And she's like, your passion doesn't have to be your job because you might resent that someday. Like your job is providing all of the values that you had and you can still do what you love and not rely on it to support your lifestyle. Like, and that was big. She's like, you don't want to hate. What you do because it's hard or the money. Yeah, it doesn't have to be one or the other. And I, I know I got chills when you just said that. And I know people listening are gonna get chills with that. The, that, yeah, we live in this world where we're consuming so much content. We just think that like everything and anything can get turned into a business. Which it can. But also, like, it's so healthy and so, necessary to be able to separate those things. And I think Kristen's exactly right. If that's where your income was coming from, let's fast forward 10, 15 years into the future, you have a family, you have all of these things, like, that's a beautiful point. And I think we wrap our identity up so much in what we do that that's just such an important message. I, I'm trying to like highlight that in every way I can put the words together, but it's such an important message for people to hear. And I think it changed everything, like from then on, of just the way I think about it, the way I feel about it. And I, you know, just decided to really bring in our, during our hot seat group retreat group number three, shout out. Thank you for this. They said bring what you love and your passion into your business. If you're an entertainer, entertain, entertain on, on reels. If you're a connections, connect with your clients, nurture them, create that space that gives you those same feelings that you love about doing theater and bring it into your business. And those people that vibe with you are going to come and it's just going to bring you so much more joy. And so you're on what, two years since you joined Soul Tribe? Yes. And that's kind of wild. I hate to like be this woo about it, but like, if you put a pin in, the retreat was one year in, you were super excited. Still feeling like I've been doing the work. I've been doing the work. I'm still seeing subpar results. I mean, it wasn't horrible, but you still weren't feeling like you figured this thing out yet. The last year Paloma has been insane watching your business grow and flourish and you grow and flourish that like, you can't deny that there's an energetic thing to that there else. Why? I mean, you were doing everything else that you were supposed to be doing. But once you had that shift in your mindset, The results actually came after that, too, which is why, of course, there's a couple little, like, strategies and tactics, but not that much. No, and I remember you telling me, like, I don't know what to tell you. It's a mindset thing. Yeah, and you're like, bitch, that's so frustrating, but sometimes it is. Yeah, and it's just, it's been really fun to kind of, Go through that and just to like, love my job and my career and to see all these steps that like have gotten me there. And I remember you also saying like, I know it's frustrating, but like, you're going to see why this is happening. Like eventually when you get there, it's going to be like, Oh, that's why that had to happen. Yeah. And like, I almost didn't go to the retreat. And I feel like that point, like the retreat was amazing, the whole thing. But I feel like the reason I was there was for that. For that breakthrough. Yeah. Yes. That means so much to me just hearing you say that. I mean, I know that's your truth, but thank you for saying it out loud because that just validates so much to me, too, that that impact was made. And yeah, that means the world to me. So now we're even a year after Retreat, Paloma has really great success in our business. She, this isn't gonna make sense for all listeners, but we started something inside of soul tribe called the intensive. So I've been working really close one on one with Paloma and five other women where we were talking every two weeks, really high, you know, action. And I know extensions is kind of your new journey, but like, where do you stand now? theater with the passions with like does Broadway still live on your vision board? Have you fully released that? Do you still like tiptoe in that as a hobby or where do you stand with that now? I think Broadway is always going to be on my vision board. It's always going to be. Maybe one day, you never know. You can act until you die like this. So I think it's always going to live there. And it's something that I try to do. At least once a year, if I have the availability, I recently just did a show last year and like, I was able to get the lead part. I played Olive in the 25th annual Putnam County Spelling Bee, if anyone is a theater person. And it was like my return after three years of shutdown and not performing. And it just does something for my soul that like. This is where I belong. I belong on stage. I belong, like singing. This makes me so happy dancing, be entertaining, telling stories. It's just something that I love so much. And something that like, I've been able to bring into my business where my clients, that's the first thing they ask, are you doing a show right now? Are you in anything? Are you acting? Like, so it's been like, yeah. That warms my heart to think people think of me that way. They're like, oh man, like, yes, you do my hair, but you're an actor. It's like, yeah. And I love that you share that with your clients too, because like, again, a lot of people can do great hair, but it's those little connection points outside, like what makes you a person outside of just doing the hair. And so I love that your clients are in on that with you as well. I think that's really special. Yeah, they are. I try to do it as much as I can. I mean, I, my parents, like I said, they're involved in the arts as well. So it's just always around me. It's part of me. And I try to do at least one musical a year if I can. Yeah, that's amazing. That makes me happy. And so you see that continuing to be kind of how you juggle both things. And God, you know, if, if, If it's meant to be and you have some big break and someone discovers, maybe they discover this podcast and hear your story, someone discovers something one day, I love that that always lives there. But I also don't think, realistically, with what you've, what you've, the conclusions you've come to and even the success you've built, like, maybe it wouldn't even be in alignment for that to be a full time career. You know? Yeah. And I think about that too. Like if I was on Broadway, it's eight shows a week. Yeah. You're always there. And then especially if you're a top bill, like people go to see you. I'm like, there's no way I would be able to get out of my job. I'd be in New York far away from my family. And I wouldn't have the flexibility that I have to just choose and say, you know, my time is open right now. I can do a show. And. I mean, I know that if an opportunity presented, I could not say no, there would be no way to that. I could say no to that. But I think I feel like very at peace with if it doesn't happen, it's okay, because I'm still Fulfilling that dream of performing. That's really what I want. Like, I really just want to be able to be on stage and do it. And whatever capacity that is. Gives you that thrill, that high. I know you've said it probably in a lot of different words, but I'm just going to ask it one more time. And if something comes to you, great. If it doesn't, no big deal, no pressure. But like, if you could go back and talk to yourself, either at the retreat, pre retreat, wherever you feel like it was really the lowest, most lost feeling. What would you say? I would just say, hold on to your faith and trust that what's meant for you and what your purpose is, is going to reveal itself. And when you live in alignment, the opportunities come, they show up, the money shows up, you meet the right people. And you have to have a very strong faith that like. To just believe it, to put that out there that I don't know how this is going to happen, but it's gonna happen, and I know I'm gonna be okay. And just keep putting one foot in front of another, and I want to say you, Paloma, like, as your coach, that's something I see in you so strongly, is like, even if you can't see, The entire end picture, you just show up month after month after month after month. You're like, well, this kind of knocked me down this one. Okay. This, this, and you just keep taking one step in front of another. And now after all this time, we can see how much that has paid off, but I can only even imagine five more years from now, how that's going to continue to compound and pay off. So again, I am so grateful that you came on. I, I, there were so many times that I like got chills when we were recording this, so I know that those are messages that like people need to hear. Is there anything else that you feel called to share or anything else you want to dive into? I think I would just say, like, if you are experiencing what I went through, just like, really hold on to the fact that like, committing to something doesn't mean it changes who you are. Like, it doesn't mean that you're something else. If your path changes, That's okay. Like you don't have to hold on to these things that like you thought it could have been and his identity is his identity things are like, what's meant for you and your path when, like, I have to keep saying it when you're living in alignment, like, Just trust that intuition and keep going and Okay, so let's get, let's dive deeper. What does living in alignment mean to you? Cause like I know what you're saying, but there are some people that like they hear that and they don't even really get to comprehend what you're saying. What do you mean by living in alignment? I just feel like there's things you think you should do and things that feel right. And like I, when I, like for me, when I know I'm living in alignment is if something comes up, I know, like, I just know this is what I'm supposed to do. Yeah, it's 1, 200. I don't care. I'm doing it because I'm going to get the money and it's going to show up and like time and time again. It always does. It always like a check shows up in the mail or I meet somebody that says like, Hey, you can stay with me. Or like, I don't know how it happens, but I just know that like the good things I start seeing, like when I am, if I'm doing something that I'm like, Oh, maybe I shouldn't be doing that. Or maybe you get those little pings and you know, things that, that, you know, you know, something's off. Yes, like logistically, it sounds like the right thing, but I keep hitting a block after block after block. It's like this isn't an alignment. You're not supposed to go that way. And when I do just follow what my spirit says and what I feel like I want to do. And I noticed the opportunities show up and like, I'm very woo. I grew up that way. My mom is that way. We, this has just always been a part of our, our life. That's something I've just had. And I don't know how to explain that. I don't know how to explain that. It's just living, conspiring with your intuition, like your life, being, having a lifelong journey of conspiring with your intuition and not fighting against it and just trusting that. You will know even if it seems like you don't know if you get quiet enough. It's in there And no coach no class. No anything can tell you that like that's that's an internal thing I just never have a doubt like when it's something like that. It's a strong hit and it's like do it That's what you're supposed to do. And I don't have any doubt about it being the wrong thing or that it's gonna fail I don't always know how it's going to happen, but I know it is Yeah, that's why I love the quote if it's not a hell yes, it's a no, because you know when it's a hell yes, you know very clearly when it's a hell yes, so I love that, great messages yeah, any other thoughts, anything else that you want to Want to share? Yeah, I think that's that's everything. I feel really good. Thank you again. I know this is going to resonate with who it needs to resonate with and I'm curious to see years from now. Maybe we'll have you back on and just share what, you know, continuing to live in alignment with, you know, for these next few years, what that will bring. And I'll put all of Paloma's socials and stuff in the Show notes description. So if you guys feel called or connected to this in any way, I mean, I'm assuming you're cool with Instagram DMS, right? Yeah, of course. I mean, I vividly remember years ago when I was first on a podcast, just getting all those messages and building those connections. So like, if this speaks to you, do not hesitate to reach out to Paloma. Because sometimes you just need someone who's been where you've been just a few steps ahead of you to be like, okay, yeah, like that really landed. Help me with this. So I will definitely leave all your information as well. Absolutely. And I just want to say thank you for holding space for me and for your guidance along this journey and creating a space for all of us to do that and to thrive. Oh, I'm so grateful for you. I would give you the biggest hug if you were here right now. Thank you. Thank you, Paloma. And thank you everybody for listening. Like I said, everything that we talked about will be linked in the show notes and I will chat with you all next week.